Intro SMB Luigi's Dark Side

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9/23/2013, 4:08 pm
work in progress review all what you can , I WANT SOME CRITIQUES Shocked

Original : http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/07a907e6037a3a3a6eb01c7042ab0b0d

Update 1 : http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/f889bbe1fb9a598e8667e7a844f4470c

ERASED RAY -------------------------------------------------------------- now there's Hypon

Update 2 : http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/48305083b2ec473dac01c897e838c17d

ERASED SPEEDY ---------------------------------------------------------- now there's Inferno

Update 3 : http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/abf720a7adbbb0f012b51a80b46f60be

Update 4 : http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/87ecc12895084ce22696b9fa9c5332f1

TOO MUCH MORE FAN CHARS TO KNOW ALL OF THEM---------------------------------

Update 5 http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/a76a6926eadf8ebbcc0a7282a996d9cc

FINISHED-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Finished one : http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/4dbaa0b55c9e857d27627df707787aeb


Last edited by BuchonlxD on 12/8/2013, 4:43 am; edited 6 times in total

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9/23/2013, 4:27 pm
There was little to no movement, all they did was stand around. I saw two recolored hedgehogs that looked like they share shadow's personality. At least the other hedgehog had some variety too them.

Lemme give you some advice, when working on a series.

Do the intro last.

Intro's are utterly pointless and are nothing but a waste of time. Work on your content first and when you have something established, do the intro afterwords.

I can't say I exactly liked this, but nonetheless I'd like to see where this goes.

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9/23/2013, 4:45 pm
My review
looks: this intro looks nice and quiet 3D but to the very beginning the characters are misaligned.
Sound: it's a anime song those are good in an intro so good choice.
Other: the intro hasn't got enough movement yes it has some, but not enough in the intro you should go all out in animation the best you can do so that anyone watching for the first time and be impressed and want to keep on watching.
Rating: I rate this intro a 5/10... so far because this is a WIP I don't know where this will go so I'll start with that

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9/23/2013, 4:52 pm
with the scene where that sonic dude was on top of a mountain and another sonic was stalking him. The background moved with the clouds so only move the clouds
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9/23/2013, 5:16 pm
thanks for all the mid-good reviews

@twinsplayknight wrote:with the scene where that sonic dude was on top of a mountain and another sonic was stalking him. The background moved with the clouds so only move the clouds
Sonic dude in top of the mountain = Ray

Sonic stalking at him = Speedy

I did the Ray recolor just for have one more character for the series

Speedy is the fan character of http://jmkrebs30.deviantart.com (is just a recolor i don't see anything special by the moment)

I can't do that because it's an image

@SXR123 wrote:I can't say I exactly liked this, but nonetheless I'd like to see where this goes.
Thanks man , and i'm doing the intro first because if you think about it the intro let you some time to think about the storyline.

EDIT : the other FC hedgehog is Gale , is not famous it's a new one. If you search him on deviantart you will find him.

I have the permission of the creator of Gale to use him as a villian

@twinsplaywarrior wrote:My review
looks: this intro looks nice and quiet 3D but to the very beginning the characters are misaligned.
Sound: it's a anime song those are good in an intro so good choice.
Other: the intro hasn't got enough movement yes it has some, but not enough in the intro you should go all out in animation the best you can do so that anyone watching for the first time and be impressed and want to keep on watching.
Rating: I rate this intro a 5/10... so far because this is a WIP I don't know where this will go so I'll start with that
Well the song if you want to know is called COLORS by Flow , from the anime Code Geass ( a very good anime in my opinion ) the intro don't have a lot of movement i know but i don't want to do the best intro ever , it's just an introduction so i have to focus on the episodes not in the intro.

a 5/10 and in progress , that review looks promissing

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9/23/2013, 6:02 pm
Well, that logo at the beginning looks polished, nice job. The intro...eh, not much zing to it. It's really boring on how the movement was so little. And those recolors ;/. Why did shadow clone himself then they both went to a club and fell in a pool of paint? Anyway....if your having trouble with the intro just skip it for now. Content is where it matters for a debut/beginning of a series. Think of it like SMBZ's first episode.

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9/23/2013, 8:12 pm
The first shot where it shows the four characters stays on for way too long, especially since they're just standing there. A lot of the shots felt really unbalanced because the characters were mostly to one side of the camera, leaving a lot of unnecessary room open.

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9/23/2013, 9:16 pm
I honestly think you should use some different fan characters. Besides Gale, the two recolors are just...

ew...

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9/24/2013, 1:50 am
@SXR123 wrote:I honestly think you should use some different fan characters. Besides Gale, the two recolors are just...

ew...
if someone bring me his fc then alright :/

BDB here? Wow

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9/24/2013, 4:01 am
i didn't like this so much, first of all a little tip, try not to use too many things that alvin used like the portal in the start, you'll just get tons of hate comments, plus it's overused...

anyway, when you're making an intro or trailer try to actually make them do something, even if you're just introducing the characters, show me who they are in someway, what can they do etc.

they were just standing around, if you want to make someone just standing at least make him look badass by adding a crap ton of effects Very Happy

well..i'm looking forward to see how this goes, and my advice, work a lot on the story so you can make different then all the other sprite serieses.

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9/24/2013, 4:52 pm
@Tal wrote:i didn't like this so much, first of all a little tip, try not to use too many things that alvin used like the portal in the start, you'll just get tons of hate comments, plus it's overused...

anyway, when you're making an intro or trailer try to actually make them do something, even if you're just introducing the characters, show me who they are in someway, what can they do etc.

they were just standing around, if you want to make someone just standing at least make him look badass by adding a crap ton of effects Very Happy

well..i'm looking forward to see how this goes, and my advice, work a lot on the story so you can make different then all the other sprite serieses.
GOOD NEWS.

Erased Ray (Shadow's blue recolor) Of the series , now there's another FC , Hypon who have the power of motherfucking everything. (it's a Little overpowered i will do something to don't do that he looks like a god)

Added Some Little Fighting scenes

Update 2 : http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/48305083b2ec473dac01c897e838c17d

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9/24/2013, 5:04 pm
I really like hypton I think he's much better then ray, but the fighting part can you add some more smash effects?

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9/25/2013, 1:34 pm
@twinsplaywarrior wrote:I really like hypton I think he's much better then ray, but the fighting part can you add some more smash effects?
I'm glad that you like him :) , but i don't know if add hit effects , I will if some more people request it but personally i think that the hits without effects are better , and just put the effects in strong attacks.

Anyway.

Is the Hypon Rules

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9/25/2013, 1:53 pm
hit sparks are essential in a sprite movie but, your choice.

I don't think anyone's going to "request" you put hit effects in because people don't think about them too often.

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9/25/2013, 1:58 pm
@SXR123 wrote:hit sparks are essential in a sprite movie but, your choice.

I don't think anyone's going to "request" you put hit effects in because people don't think about them too often.
I don't think they are THAT essential , remember power star? awesome and without hit sparks , so i dunno if you say i will try to add more , but i'm not convinced

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9/25/2013, 2:00 pm
I've never seen that. but just because one series is successful does not mean anything.

That's the same as saying "well since bill gates dropped out of college and is now a billionaire, I can do it to and become a billionaire."

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9/25/2013, 2:10 pm
@SXR123 wrote:I've never seen that. but just because one series is successful does not mean anything.

That's the same as saying "well since bill gates dropped out of college and is now a billionaire, I can do it to and become a billionaire."
That's cool but not real , I will dream with that today.

ANYWAY , Speedy is going to be erased soon , (trying to get another FC that don't looks just a recolor of shadow in Green)

I love all of you guys Mad

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9/26/2013, 4:11 pm
Sorry but yes I have to double post.

ERASED SPEEDY - now there's inferno , a hedgehog that controlls the fire.

http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/abf720a7adbbb0f012b51a80b46f60be

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9/26/2013, 4:43 pm
@BuchonlxD wrote:Sorry but yes I have to double post.

ERASED SPEEDY - now there's inferno , a hedgehog that controlls the fire.

http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/abf720a7adbbb0f012b51a80b46f60be
I think you're still holding that first shot for too long. After "sekai sae mo", I'd switch to a different shot of something else happening.
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9/26/2013, 4:52 pm
@『Joshl92』 wrote:
@BuchonlxD wrote:Sorry but yes I have to double post.

ERASED SPEEDY - now there's inferno , a hedgehog that controlls the fire.

http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/abf720a7adbbb0f012b51a80b46f60be
I think you're still holding that first shot for too long. After "sekai sae mo", I'd switch to a different shot of something else happening.  
I don't have a lot of resources right now , i will see what i can do , i will try in the next update

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9/27/2013, 4:52 pm
DOUBLE POST.

after asking to like over 9000 persons if i should add effects in there , OVER 9000 replied yes.

So New update budy.

http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/abf720a7adbbb0f012b51a80b46f60be

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9/27/2013, 5:06 pm
I'm still confused as to what is supposed to be going on. all I see are panned shots, fades in and fades out and characters who I guess are supposed to be evil.

The main characters personalities all seem to be the exact same. It also isn't giving us any kind of reason as to why Luigi is suddenly evil. I know that would be explained in the series but shouldn't he at least kind of transition into good to bad luigi at SOME point in the intro?

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9/27/2013, 5:59 pm
@SXR123 wrote:I'm still confused as to what is supposed to be going on. all I see are panned shots, fades in and fades out and characters who I guess are supposed to be evil.

The main characters personalities all seem to be the exact same. It also isn't giving us any kind of reason as to why Luigi is suddenly evil. I know that would be explained in the series but shouldn't he at least kind of transition into good to bad luigi at SOME point in the intro?
Um yeah... Ugh how stupid i am? I will in a next update if i can SXR just i was thinking too much on the story libe and yeah, i forgeted

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9/27/2013, 6:23 pm
Lastly, why the nugget are there sonic characters in mario's world.

That's the biggest mystery here.

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9/27/2013, 6:45 pm
@SXR123 wrote:Lastly, why the nugget are there sonic characters in mario's world.

That's the biggest mystery here.
You will see when it comes out Razz

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